Conquering Fear of Contests

Contests scare me.

I'm determined to improve my skill and scope. So I challenged myself by entering a contest.
I chose to enter contests without an entry fee, because this is my first experience in any type of writing contest. I approached it as a learning opportunity and not a monetary investment.
I still needed to figure out what to enter and if I had the right material ready before any deadlines.

 

Step 1.

Find free contests. (Oprah isn't giving things away anymore? Bummer).

Thanks to Twitter, Facebook, and friends I heard of two similar contests within the entry window.
PitchSlam and Nest pitch. Both of those contests are based on a 35 word pitch, or tight summary of the novel, and the first 250-300 words of your novel.

 

Step 2.

REFINE REFINE REFINE

I formed a group to tackle this one and invited anyone also involved in the contest I was going to enter to join in order to refine our entries as a group. We posted our original Pitch and 250. The group commented on things that worked (positives) and things that didn't (constructive). Then we revised based on feedback. We posted revisions and commented again. There were many impressive entries in our group. I filled expected over half our group to be chosen as finalists for PitchSlam, the contest with the first announced results. Two out of our 18 active members were picked. No I was not one of them.

Step 3.

Keep Trying.

The first contest provided me with feedback that I needed to improve my work in ways I had not known.
I applied the information I was given to my novel, pitch, and first words.
(Nestpitch contest's submission window actually closed before I received feedback, but I applied changes to my own work anyway--hoping the selection committees/teams would see potential in my story with what they had on hand)

I was selected in the Nestpitch contest!
The last three weeks have been working with my contest team to refine my entry for the final round. That round begins in two days from the time I'm writing this post.
.
I'd love to say I obtained an agent from entering my first ever contest, but that is not what this post is about (and I have no idea what the final results will be yet). It is about conquering my fear of entering contests, which is not related to results.

In a short window of time I have gained not only the stamina to lose, and the determination to continue with my personal goal, but also the confidence to be selected.

These lessons are essential for me in my continued growth as a writer. Pushing myself to the next level.

My Personal Motto:

Embrace your Quirks.

Pursue your Talents.

I can't accomplish those things without a little fear conquering.

On to the next challenge.

Four Stages of Being Humble as a Writer.

The secret to staying Humble... 

Stage 1: Melodrama
When I think I've just written a world shattering deep passage that will win a Nobel prize, or at least a Peabody, and make it to millions of Pinterest boards because it's so profound and life empowering...

boring...

Stage 2: Action/Adventure
"This action scene is AWESOME!"

This isn't logical, doesn't make sense, and no one could survive such nonsense.
Run, run, run!!!

Stage 3: Dialogue
"Witty banter-- this is totally working--I'm like multiple-personality-good at writing dialogue!"

In real life someone would be slapped by now...
Probably a couple times.

Stage 4: Humor
"I'm a comedic genius!"

What the heck?!? Delete--delete--delete!!!
Close one.

At least maintaining humility is an entertaining process that I have the chance to fix before the world is exposed.

*Write on*

Talent Direction Goal Snowball Post: A Two Step Guide to Being Awesome

That's a dumb title, I know. I'll roll it all up nice and tidy at the end and you'll be like, "Great Title!"

Let's begin.
Even if you struggle with believing in yourself, let's admit you have Talent.
(look at that. I even capitalized it).

We all do. It doesn't have to be the same level of Talent as the person witting next to you or staring back at you on the movie screen. Your Talents can grow as much or as little as you Direct them- kind of like a Snowball filled with hope and a whole lot of effort.

But,

 Talent needs Direction. Let's make those Talents do what we want them to do.

Do we have Goals?

Let's call that Direction you seek a Goal. Now let's not get crazy. I'm not ringing in the New Year over here. (remember like a month ago when everyone made unrealistic resolutions? This is going to be easier--because we'll apply the snowball method of debt reduction to Goal completion and Talent investment). 

Ha! I'm tying it all together!

Good point. I make stuff up a lot. I am a writer after all...

Anyways. Directing Talent= Goal Setting.
Resolution face?

Don't worry I have a plan!

Apply the Goal Snowball mentioned earlier:
In other words, once a Goal has become a habit--then a new Goal can be introduced.
This is our budget of sanity and Direction with balancing time and priorities. Not to mention energy.

We do not have to be super-human to be successful.

Even the most successful people feel like this sometimes.

Don't let unrealistic ideals slam the door in your face.

So get that hug, and invest in your Talents with the Snowball method.

This is how.
STEP 1:  
Focus on the one thing that you can accomplish the fastest.
Yes, I said it. Don't pick your biggest weakness or most daunting flaw first.

It may be the thing you want to tackle most. You may have been trying for YEARS to overcome whatever weakness, strengthen whatever Talent, but still fall short.
Put it on the list.

But, start with a sure winner.
For example: If you have a crutch word--eliminate it. Just the one word. No more.
(You get it, pick something you can nail).


Nailed it!

Sweet. Let's move on to the second aspect of the Talent Snowball. Grow it.
Your confidence is up. You nailed a Goal set to Direct your Talent.

STEP 2:
Now roll that confidence and increased skill into the next easiest thing on the list.

Let me guess? You're thinking, "Well that was a waste of time. What good is it to build up a bunch of tiny little Goals all the time?"
Can this be my point?

I'm adding up in my head all the basic skills this kid needed to learn to even begin learning this kind of movement. (lift head, roll over, sit, crawl, stand, walk, groove, backflip hand on floor face save)?
Seriously, did this kid go from rolling over to backflips or something?
Sheesh, that's awesome.

So yeah, I'm telling you to build these tiny little abilities and make them massive!
Start with STEP 1 and continue repeating STEP 2.

Keep adding up the small things: YOU'RE AWESOME!


This has been a Talent Direction Goal Snowball Post.
Nailed it.

Writing reality

I write every day.

Writing feels like this.



I LOVE it! I can't get enough.
So I'm a writer! It's awesome, right?

But....



It's more like this when I actually look at it... A bit sour and terrifying.

Which is why I like to think of myself as a reviser too.

Revision is like...



Whoa, that was awesome!
Was that magic?
No. It was editing. And everything is better for it.

Always writing. Forever revising.

High Five!

Or... Just...

Back to work.


Also--this is my first successful use of Gif's. I've tried to paste them here before and only got the code stuff on here. So woo! It worked. Way more fun than just words.

Body Image: Let's Change It

I'm an adult.

I think things like, "How do I look?"

I look in the mirror and cringe on a regular basis. It doesn't strike me as an abnormal reaction. I don't often bother to verbalize my thoughts about it...

And yet today when I waiting for my six year old daughter to change into her swim suit I heard her say, "the top of my legs are so fat and ugly."

My first reaction was anger. "What?"
Then reason, "We don't talk like that about ourselves."

She looked at me stunned. I'm not sure what she thought my reaction would be, but I definitely did something she wasn't expecting.

Good! I thought. Now I have her attention. I had to figure out what to do with it, and fast.
I know my girl and there is only a limited window of use of sustained attention.

"In our family we only use the words healthy or unhealthy. Are you healthy?"
"I guess..."
"Good. I think so too. When we get home we can make a fun poster to highlight all the ways we choose to be healthy." (She is a sucker for posters--seriously. She's constantly begging to make charts and posters. It's cute).

This also gave me time to gather my thoughts and develop a plan for the new body image regime I had just instilled for my entire household.

Here's what I came up with. Body image should not be solely defined by our visible characteristics. Thank goodness I told my girl we were using healthy and unhealthy! I could use more than just physical appearance criteria! Phew, dodged a bullet on that quick reaction.

It's not perfect--and didn't cut and paste nice and dandy, but it's a place to start. Also I had columns- it just wouldn't cooperate with the blog thing at my skill/knowledge/tech level)

The Poster:

Approved terms for Szymanski Family Body Image

HEALTHY OR UNHEALTHY

HEALTHY

Adequate sleep

Active (physical activity)

Good hygiene (clean and groomed)

Learning about/working on things/skills

Develop talents

Service minded

Grateful

 

UNHEALTHY

 

Not enough/too much sleep

Unbalanced food choices

Inactive

Poor hygiene
Disinterested in things/skills

Stunted talents/loss of talents

Self-centered/entitled
Selfish


If the majority of your behavior is within the healthy choices you are healthy.

 

If the majority of your behavior is within the unhealthy choices you are unhealthy and must pick one area/behavior to work on. Start with one and build from there.           

 

 

Being healthy isn't easy. It takes a lot of work. Dedication, determination, and discipline are all required to be healthy. Few, if any, of us have all the areas of health listed conquered at any given time. As long as you are majority healthy, you are healthy If you're not- guess what it's not the end of the world!!! You can pick one single area to improve. Make a goal for just that area, maybe two goals if you want to be an overachiever. Bring that area back over to the healthy side and if your still off balance pick one more until you are once again majority healthy.

I for one m constantly cycling.

It's okay. I'm human.

And I do things like make my family group costumes like this (I'm proud of this BTW Aquabats rule)

 

 

Disclaimer:

I like fat. It's not a bad word.

However, using it in a way to speak negatively or oneself or others is not the proper use of the word. Fat can be good and I have a great appreciation for it when in proper context.

Honor fat, use it for good.

Let's rethink how we encourage good choices in our families. Not to mention how we frame body image in everyone. It's not just what you see.

Five Reasos I Love Numbered or Bulleted Blog Posts

 

1.  Convenience.

It makes skimming for relevant information much more convenient. I mean, who has time to read entire paragraphs for the single point of interest? Not me.

2.  Pretty.

My eyes just prefer the look of things ordered.

3.  Plays to my skills.

I don’t want to totally claim and embrace the fact I lean toward lazy, but bulleted items help me grasp one or two main points that I can put energy toward improving without bogging my brain down in the overwhelming information inside each paragraph. Even this paragraph I’m writing at the very moment is getting a little overwhelming for me.

4.  Time saver.

Along the same lines as convenience. I don’t have time to sift through irreleivant information. My kids are hovering at my side, telling me to look at them (balancing shoes on their ears—it’s a little impressive). My phone is dinging that I have some sort of notification, the school just called that one of my kids has an overdue library book, and I have to fill out claim forms, work forms, and time cards. So, yes I’m ever so grateful for the blogger who takes the time to put their posts into a list that allows me to pick and choose where to spend my time while browsing their ideas and suggestions.

5.  Teaches me organized thinking.

I am not the most organized individual. I have piles of papers in every room of the house. Books I’m referencing stacked on all surfaces, and stuff (I don’t even want to figure out what it is) shoved behind, under, and inside every furniture item. Thank goodness that blog post shows me how a non-cluttered idea should be.

…Now to find a bulleted blog post about de-cluttering my home in five easy steps.

 

The Magic of Relating Experiences

I once read a blog post where a woman described being defecated on by her newborn son in such horrifically fascinating detail that I longed for the opportunity to commiserate her experience with her.
I've since changed my mind on that...

The art of relating an experience is what an author/writer aspires to do.
Doing it well is not only a skill, it's a master-craft.

Did you see Lego Movie?
Masterbuilders? Well there are MasterWriters.
Those are the people that can see the elements of an experience that can be arranged and highlighted in such fashion as to render the listener/reader incapable of turning away or closing the book.

Taking things from one mono-angle and elevating the perspective to widen your ability to appreciate the horror of butt-splosion from an unhappy infant.

We've all read the Facebook posts that say nothing more than *Boo, or some other derivation of bland complaint. Did you fall into the trap of following-up for more detail?
Did you get any more detail?
Often those who lack the vision to expound on their experiences from the start can't satisfy your curiosity (at least that's what I've decided to tell myself after totally falling for this kind of post and being left in the lurch).

How much more satisfying is being transported into a friends experience--getting a glimpse into their ability to manipulate an event based on their reinterpretation for entertainment sake? (I'm not talking exaggeration or falsification--far better. The ability to relate an event and make it so personal you know what someone is talking about even if it's never happened to you).
Last winter I was driving a particularly treacherous canyon road in the middle of a whiteout snowstorm. I was terrified. Literally scared out of my mind.
Guess what? That's not interesting.
And it didn't help me handle the situation with any additional skill or grace.

Drawing upon some story relator masters I had been devoting hours of spare time listening to/reading. I decided to *retell* myself the experience I was having.
Winter Olympics were happening during that time. It gave me a perfect opportunity to reshape the event.
NOTE: I'm still learning this craft of story relating--you will see the flaws, but this is a blog about the bumps in trying to bring myself up to the level of those I'm inspired by. Enjoy my amateurish awareness into new ways of thinking, speaking, sharing... :D

*I just won the gold medal in multi-ton vehicle canyon Luge! It was a white knuckle blind turn race with 27 competitors backed up behind me- poised to take the lead. No one could see worth crap. Making turns as we had all memorized them in the months of practice runs down and up the canyon. Practice paid off! We're alive! But, I got the gold- so HA!*

I failed to bring the reader into the moment the snowsheet cleared to reveal I was in the oncoming lane with a massive semi-truck yards way and closing. The only thing that saved me was the mind-numbingly slow speeds required under that kind of snow-terror-driving.

Practicing to re-frame my experiences, so that even I would want to have them, has a bonus effect.
My life is way more awesome than it used to be.
Almost every mundane event and experience can benefit from a change of angle. I have found I'm much more content day to day.
*If you see me staring insanely at nothing I'm being awesome. Ask me about it in ten minutes and I can relate to you how awesome the moment was.

If you want to experience True MasterWriters I'll direct you to:
Dan Carlin (this man is the best I've ever heard. Even if you have no interest in history, listening to his podcasts will heighten your expectations for retelling of events) Hardcore History
http://www.dancarlin.com/disp.php/hharchive
And anything written by Sara Baxter www.sarajbaxter.com. 
http://hahasforhoohas.com/stories/kindergarten-wisdom


There is magic in all things--If you know how to tell(show if you're writing, of course) it right.